Surface Laptop
The Surface Laptop 7: Microsoft’s Bold Experiment in Making You Regret Your Purchase
Micro$oft has done it again. No, not in a good way. They’ve decided that what consumers really need in 2024 is another underpowered, overpriced, and ultimately useless ARM-based laptop—because apparently, the Surface Laptop 7 with a Snapdragon CPU wasn’t designed for work but for testing your patience.
Who Asked for This?
Let’s be honest, nobody was sitting at their desk, staring at their reliable x86-based laptop, thinking, “You know what would make my life better? A laptop that’s slower, has worse compatibility, and can’t even run half the programs I need.”
And yet, here we are.
Microsoft, in its infinite wisdom, has blessed us with the Snapdragon-powered Surface Laptop 7, a device so gloriously incapable that Amazon had to slap a “Frequently Returned Item” label on its listing. Because, surprise! Consumers don’t like spending over $1,000 on a crippled Windows experience.
Windows on ARM: The Sequel to Windows RT That Nobody Wanted
Micro$oft tried this before. Remember Windows RT? Yeah, nobody does, because it was a failure. But that didn’t stop them from giving it another shot with Windows 10/11 on ARM, which is basically a fancier way of saying:
- You can’t install most x86 apps without emulation (which is slow and painful).
- Drivers? Compatibility? Who needs those? Certainly not you, the poor soul who just wanted to use their peripherals.
- Good luck with gaming! Unless you consider running Solitaire at 30FPS an accomplishment.
It’s almost like Micro$oft looked at the past failures of Windows on ARM and said, “Yes. Let’s do that again.”
But Battery Life, Though!
Ah yes, the one selling point: better battery life—because that totally makes up for the fact that everything else about the laptop sucks.
What’s the point of having a laptop that lasts 20 hours if you can’t actually do anything with it? You can browse Edge, write some basic Word docs, and maybe—if you’re lucky—watch a PowerPoint slideshow at a smooth 12 FPS.
Who is This For?
Not for professionals. Not for gamers. Not for power users. So who?
- Tech masochists who enjoy self-inflicted suffering.
- Micro$oft employees who got it as a “gift” and can’t return it.
- People who buy laptops based on battery life alone, ignoring the fact that it can’t run half the programs they need.
Final Verdict: Stay Away
If you enjoy pain, disappointment, and the thrill of returning products, by all means, grab yourself a Surface Laptop 7 with Snapdragon. Otherwise, do yourself a favor—stick with x86, where things actually work.
