SPKZMC:LordDestructo
👁️ Royal Decree Dossier: LordDestructo
Subject Name: LordDestructo
Known Alias: The American Anarch
Faction Affiliation: None
Connection Origin: United States (Ping: 220ms ± 30ms)
Security Classification: ⚪ Observation Only
📍 Initial Encounter
First contact occurred when MoNoRi-Chan, enjoying his regularly scheduled Spectator Stalking Hour™ (also known as "Zong" among Royal Decree), casually phased into the underground mining zone near spawn. There, amidst shadows and stone, lurked a lone player—LordDestructo, when he appeared and said "sup" in chat, he snapped into high alert upon MoNoRi-Chan’s appearance and DOS'd out like a creeper in a candle shop.
MoNoRi-Chan watched LordDestructo promptly logged out, likely under the assumption he'd been caught by the Minecraft FBI. Moments later, he returned with a chill message in chat:
> “No hard feelings, man. Just do whatever you want.”
The Royal Decree officially recognizes this phrase as:
“I’m probably guilty, but I read the signboard at spawn and I know my rights.”
🧷 Alleged Crimes
Despite the name “LordDestructo,” the suspect has not actually committed destruction per se. Instead, he has been observed partaking in:
- Looting unlocked Free Market shulker boxes, such as those belonging to Abdul & Co.
- Opportunistic theft of bulk goods (potatoes, carrots, etc.) from drop boxes in the region
ourfarm, which were not properly protected - Utilizing utility clients to locate long-abandoned underground stashes and expired claims
Notably:
- No griefing was observed
- No spawn destruction attempted
- No PvP or harassment toward other players
- No bypassing of protection plugins
🎥 Spectator Mode: The Nang Zong Experience
Spectator Mode is not just a tool—it's a lifestyle. For Royal Decree operatives like MoNoRi-Chan and Professor Atts, it’s the equivalent of slipping into a silk bathrobe woven from pure curiosity and server omniscience.
> “You're not fixing griefs. You're not managing land claims. You're just… vibing in the 4th dimension, silently judging people's poor block palette choices.”
While in Zong, LordDestructo was observed:
- Using cheats to find loot caches (again, not forbidden)
- Dumping all acquired loot into his Ender Chest (efficient)
- Never once typing in chat—an ominous but not illegal behavior
🧾 Royal Decree Ruling
While some players argued for his exile to the mythical Mine-Gulag™, the facts don’t support any such sentencing.
🧑⚖️ Royal Decree Judgment:
- The loot in question came from either unlocked containers or expired claims
- The spawn explicitly reads:
> “NO ANTI-CHEAT. HACK IF YOU MUST. DON’T GRIEF SPAWN OR STEAL FROM CLAIMED LAND.”
- There is no violation of server law as written or enforced
- MoNoRi-Chan’s own words:
> “As much as I want to bonk him with banhammer, it ain’t illegal to rob the forgotten.”
The court hereby finds LordDestructo to be:
⛏️ Legally Scuffed but Not Guilty
📌 Trivia
- He’s been online more hours than the guy who built a beautiful house and ghosted the server after two weeks.
- LordDestructo’s Ender Chest contents include 12 shulkers labeled “LOL FREE.”
- His movement patterns match 87% similarity with known Baritone bots, but no automation detected—he may just be… naturally soulless.
- His motto? “If it's not locked, it’s stock.”
🏛️ Royal Decree Summary
Subject: LordDestructo
Verdict: Cleared of wrongdoing
Admin Opinion: Slightly sus, but within bounds
Next Evaluation: Upon reported grief, or further sightings of suspicious shulker redistribution
“He plays the anarchy game like a lawyer. And that’s terrifying.” – MoNoRi-Chan
