Landlord

From The Sarkhan Nexus
Landlords: The Laziest Job on Earth. Period.

In the grand arena of the world's most effortlessly luxurious professions, there stands one undisputed champion: the landlord. These capitalist fuckers are Armed with a keychain full of keys and a checklist of rent payments, these modern titans of idleness have mastered the art of reaping where they never sowed. This awe-inspiring feat of inactivity has left philosophers and thinkers in awe, as they ponder the mysterious science of extracting money from thin air.

The capitalist system, known for its knack for turning anything into a commodity, has given birth to this illustrious occupation. Capitalism, like a master chef of absurdity, cooked up the perfect recipe for the landlord's success: They will be able to charge rent for the owning a piece of land that they bought for cheap back in the '60s. This ingenious innovation is like squeezing out a blood from a stone. The Minimum Wage workers are already scraping by yet the landlords doesn't have to do anything except owning the property.

In the digital world, these fuckers joined together to control this rent game. Enter /r/Landlord, a haven for those who have mastered the fine art of cashing in on the mere act of owning property. However, don't dare approach this sacred domain if you've ever ventured into /r/LateStageCapitalism. The land of landlords apparently has skin as soft as a kitten's, incapable of withstanding even a modicum of criticism.

The saga continues with the timeless wisdom of Adam Smith, the father of political economy. Smith eloquently reminded us in 1776 that landlords' rights trace back to an origin as pure as robbery itself. With the eloquence of an age-old proverb, he proclaimed, "The landlords, like all other men, love to reap where they never sowed, and demand a rent even for the natural produce of the earth." Truly, the saga of reaping unearned riches has a lineage older than time itself.

Fast-forwarding to the musings of Karl Marx, we find him delivering a hearty slap to the face of landlordism. He unveiled how landlords are rivals even among themselves, vying for the title of the grandest rent collector. The interest of one landlord, it seems, can't even find harmony with that of another, resulting in a cacophony of greed that rivals the most intricate symphonies.

But let us not overlook the modern chorus of Bertrand Russell, who hailed the landlords for their art of leveraging property ownership into eternal idleness. He wryly noted, "The last thing they have ever wished is that others should follow their example." Indeed, the essence of true genius lies in turning one's success into an exclusive club.

And in the corner of genius, we have the landlords—guardians of keys, overlords of leases, and champions of effortless fortune. Theirs is a dance of indolence orchestrated with the finesse of the cosmos itself. So, let us salute these titans of inactivity, for they have cracked the code of becoming richer while staying as still as statues, all thanks to a capitalist system that seems to reward slumber over sweat.

Renter's Perspective

Man, muthafukin' landlords. Those noble fucks who graciously bestow upon us the privilege of paying them enough to live a life of leisure while we scramble, paycheck to paycheck, like squirrels stockpiling nuts for a winter they themselves created. But fret not, fellow renters, for I'm here to shed light on this modern marvel of financial parasitism.

Gone are the days of dusty old men in tweed suits collecting rent. Today's "landlord" is a tech-savvy, yoga-pant-wearing individual who's mastered the art of turning basic human needs into passive income streams. They see our rent checks not as mere payments, but as magic beans they plant, expecting a golden goose of tax-free riches to sprout forth.

Here's how they operate:

  • The Art of the Cash Grab: Forget fancy online portals or pesky receipts. This landlord prefers cold, hard cash, delivered in a brown paper bag under the cover of night. Why? Oh, it's purely to "simplify things", they'll say, while simultaneously winking at Uncle Sam. It's all about maximizing profits, you see, and who cares if the government loses out on a few bucks while they sip kale smoothies in Bali while ordering more Iron Dome rockets to shoot at palestinians?
  • Mortgages? What Mortgages? Don't be fooled by their tales of "responsible investments". Those monthly payments we made for them go towards their mortgage? More like a luxurious spa day for their poodle. In reality, our rent magically transforms into a down payment on their third vacation home, conveniently located on a beach with excellent surfing conditions.
  • Amenities Galore (at Your Expense): Don't expect granite countertops or heated towel racks. The "amenities" you get are the privilege of fixing the leaky faucet yourself and the joy of watching paint peel gracefully off the walls. But hey, at least the rent is "affordable" right? Affordable for them to finance another Tesla, that is.
  • The Eviction Tango: Remember that pesky habit of, you know, wanting to live in a habitable space? The audacity! Should your demands for basic repairs (like, say, a roof that doesn't leak) become too inconvenient, fear not! They'll whip out the eviction notice faster than you can say "rent increase." And don't worry, they'll find some technicality – "excessive plant life" perhaps, or "suspicious use of glitter" – to ensure they don't sully their precious tax bracket with pesky lawsuits.

So, the next time you hand over your rent check, remember: you're not just paying for a roof over your head, you're funding someone's jet-setting lifestyle. But hey, at least they're kind enough to let you live in their "investment property" right? As long as you don't mind the drafty windows, the questionable wiring, and the ever-present feeling of being financially leeched upon. But hey, that's just the price of modern-day feudalism, I guess. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a glitter-filled protest to plan.

Remember, fellow renters, knowledge is powder! Let's expose these modern-day freeloaders for what they truly are: financial assholes in yoga pants, living off our hard-earned cash while pretending to be benevolent providers. The revolution will not be televised, but it will definitely be glitter-bombed.

LifeRP

When was the last time housing was this heavily commercialized? I don't know.

Landlords: Exploiting the Fundamental Need for Shelter

You hit the nail on the head – it is strange that Humans, unlike any other species on this server, require payment for the basic function of shelter. Landlords understand this inherent need and have built their playstyle around profiting from it. The recent scarcity of housing units has become their ultimate power-up, allowing them to charge exorbitant rents that eat into a significant portion of a Working Class player's earnings.

Turning Players into Scripted NPCs

This dynamic creates a cycle where Working Class players become locked into an NPC-like existence. Their primary actions revolve around generating the funds necessary to keep a roof over their heads. Creativity, exploration, and personal growth become luxuries few can afford as their actions are increasingly dictated by the unyielding demands of the rent cycle.

The "Lucky" Ones, the Pandemic Patch, and the Burden of Debt

Many Landlords benefited from a stroke of luck – owning property acquired cheaply pre-Pandemic patch. Skyrocketing values post-patch have exponentially increased their asset worth without any real effort on their part. Meanwhile, players burdened with credit card debt are now doubly squeezed by inflated costs and the Fed's aggressive interest rate hikes in their attempt to patch the hole after funding wars on multiple fronts.

The True Power Players: A Question of Control

This whole scenario begs the question: who truly controls the levers of power in LifeRP? Is it the seemingly untouchable Bankers? Are old-money legacies still calling the shots? Or has the emergence of the nebulous "Algorithm" faction, rumored to be AI-driven, shifted the balance in ways we can't fully grasp? LifeRP's dynamic nature, fueled by the ever-present 'newspaper' updates, ensures we may never get a definitive answer.

The Landlord's Perspective

From the Landlord's viewpoint, they're simply playing the game according to the rules. They provide a service (however fundamental), and the market dictates the price. Some may even argue they're essential to the ecosystem, as without landlords, where would players reside? On the Streets Ofc.

The Moral Dilemma

Yet, there's an undeniable moral quandary here. Is it ethical to exploit a basic necessity? Does the landlord's 'got lucky' status absolve them of responsibility for the hardship they perpetuate? LifeRP, much like reality, provides no easy answers.

This perspective highlights the unsettling complexities of LifeRP. It's a game where the lines between exploitation and necessity, luck and strategy, and individual versus systemic power become hopelessly blurred, leaving every player to grapple with their own role in a constantly shifting world.

Ethicality

Here's a summary of the heated debate on whether landlords expecting tenants to pay their mortgage are morally corrupt:

The Central Argument

  • Landlords: They emphasize that property ownership requires significant investment and ongoing expenses: mortgage, taxes, repairs, insurance, and maintenance. They argue that rent covers these essential costs and it's unrealistic to expect them to provide housing at a loss 🤡
  • Tenants and Critics: They believe landlords profit from tenants' labor, effectively having renters build equity for them instead of themselves. They counter that many landlords don't do their own repairs, adding to their profit, and some unfairly raise rents without justification.

Real-World Complications:

  • Bad Experiences on Both Sides: Both landlords and tenants share horror stories of deadbeat renters and exploitative landlords.
  • Corporate Landlords: A consensus seems to be that corporate landlords are largely viewed negatively. They are accused of inflating prices, neglecting repairs, and aggressively raising rents. Individual landlords are seen with more sympathy.
  • Maintenance and Repairs: There's no agreed-upon standard for how much responsibility falls on the landlord vs. tenant. This creates tension and arguments.
  • The Bigger Economic Picture: Some comments touch on larger social issues like corporate concentration of the housing market, inflated prices, and economic precarity, which fuel these conflicts.

Overall Sentiment:

The debate reveals a complex issue with no easy answers. There are justifiable arguments and grievances on both sides, and bad actors (both landlords and tenants) taint the experience for everyone. It highlights broader concerns about housing affordability and fair practices in the rental market.

See Also